Archives for finding happiness

A Bold Calling – A Life of Service

This week I want to dedicate the blog to shine a spotlight on those still living and continuing forward Dr. Martin Luther King’s life’s work by living a life of service.

Do you know someone or are you someone who has dedicated his or her life to make the world better?

  • A social worker
  • A lobbyist fighting for social justice, equal rights or environmental protection
  • A priest
  • A teacher
  • A doctor or nurse
  • A soldier
  • A public servant
  • A coach
  • A researcher or author
  • A non-profit founder or leader
  • An investor putting funding into products and services that move us toward “the dream”

Not everyone will get out today, this week, this month, even this year and offer their talent, time, and energy to help a cause move forward. I’m not shaming anyone. Sometimes we have to focus on obligations, if even for the sake of all who depended on us. It’s just life.

I know you want to honor Dr. King’s legacy, so here is an option that can take all but two minutes and will keep the flame of service alive by honoring the efforts of those who inspire you with their service.

Please leave a comment to tag and recognize this person or people for all, or even just a little, of what they do. Tell us what they do to inspire you and how they make you feel. Then make a promise to do an act of kindness within a particular time frame in that person’s honor. Once your act of kindness has been done, post a picture, tell us about it, and tag the person you honored again.

#CauseARipple #MLK

Dreams Mashup (NAS vs Sweet Dreams vs MLK)

Martin Luther King Jr.-I Have a Dream Speech NAS-Street Dreams Marilyn Manson-Sweet Dreams Music mashup

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a 13-year-old leadership and career development firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business  She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where some of her students won the 2018 national competition, were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs, and won the 2019 People’s Choice Award. 

If I Die Today, If I Live Another 40 Years

Recently, I’ve noticed a lot of announcements of people dying young. The reasons have varied. It has made me increasingly aware that life is precious and must not be taken for granted.

It seems safe to assume that I have plenty of time left – but nobody knows for sure.

On Halloween, my daughters and I visited a local historic cemetery that had reenactments of Revolutionary and Civil War soldiers. It was hard to find a headstone for anybody who lived past their 40s. In today’s day and age, the life expectancy dictates that I am now at the midlife mark.

Not long ago, I read that people my generation, especially women, are more prone to a midlife crisis, due to the ideology that we could have it all. This month, I’ll be tested for adult-onset asthma and chronic bronchitis. I had pneumonia two years in a row. I would not say that I’m having a midlife crisis at all, but I am coming to terms with my mortality. You see, there was a night last year and there was a night this year that I thought I might not wake up.

When I fell ill in 2018 with acute sinusitis, then bronchitis, then pneumonia, it lasted several months. I suffered not just physically, but also emotionally, financially, and mentally. Because breathing itself was difficult, most of my go-to’s for self-care weren’t even possible.

I couldn’t meditate. I couldn’t do self-hypnosis (or hypnosis for anyone else, for that matter). I couldn’t do yoga. I couldn’t even watch a comedy. I couldn’t go outside and be in nature since my allergies caused my distress.

I was running on about 30% energy, which meant that I was not getting 70% of the stuff done that I should have been for my business, for my kids, for my house, for my bills, yadda yadda yadda. Add to that a glitch in my healthcare that suddenly tripled our bill, and a mandatory trip to the ER care of a minute clinic nurse practitioner who would not let me leave with my kids unless I had a ride for them and someone else to drive me to the hospital.

To boot, I had just invested thousands of dollars on a coaching program and I had just taken my kids to Disney. It was the worst possible time to not be able to work at full capacity.

After several months, I recovered physically, but the financial repercussions took several months more, and the mental repercussions lasted much longer. I fell into a depression like I hadn’t experienced since I was very young.

Thankfully, I was able to pull out of it by being vigilant about my self-care. I even invested in a hot tub.

In March when somebody I loved was murdered, I was glad to have been more mentally stable through that. It could have broken me. My world view did shift, though. It was a reminder that we could go at any time.

This past October when I got sick, I was determined to prevent the downslide experience of 2018.

Thankfully it was not as severe for as long. I was still able to go outside, laugh, and practice meditation, yoga, and self-hypnosis on most days. I was probably at about 60% energy at my lowest, and I’m running about 90 to 95% now.

I know gratitude has major benefits for mental health. In my New Year’s post, I proclaimed to make being in gratitude more of a ritual and habit. In an effort to keep my head and heart strong through this sickness, I took stock of all of the great things that I did in my life. After I did this, I had a very eerie sense of peace about dying.

Let me be clear – I have two kids (8 and 9) and I am determined to watch them grow up and have kids of their own. I am not ready to die. But after I looked at that list, I realized that I have done a lot of things on other people’s bucket lists. I was happy for myself, but also very sad for others. I started to think about what’s left to do. Because if I’m going to get many more years, I’m going to want to do many more things in those years – as much as possible, as much as I’m able.

As I’ve shared, I hired a team of coaches to help me realize my vision.

I feel very good about the impact that I’ve made in people’s lives so
far working as a one-on-one career coach, an adjunct professor, and an
instructor. I want to do more. I want to make work better for many more people. I want to apply my personal experience as well as the experiences of my clients over these past 15 or so years, and to take what I’ve learned about conscious leadership, neuroscience, quantum physics, human performance, mental health, wellness, mindfulness, emotional intelligence, and transformation and relay it on a much larger scale.

On a smaller scale, I want to be a better professor. I want to remember what it was like to be a young adult – scared, a bit to a lot defensive, somewhat fragile. I want to be a better bridge to the “real world” so that what I teach them has a much greater impact on who they become as leaders.

I have some other bucket list things, like seeing Alaska and northern lights, visiting Europe, Africa, Australia, and Asia.

Most importantly, I want to be a great mom. I want to be better at loving them through their mistakes and missteps.

Have you ever made a bucket list? What’s on yours?

Have you ever made a list of cool things you’ve done? What are your top 5 accomplishments?

Neil Finn & Friends – Anytime (Live from 7 Worlds Collide)

From the concert film 7 Worlds Collide. Recorded Live at The St. James Theatre in Auckland, New Zealand in April of 2001. Live band features Johnny Marr (The Smiths) and Ed O’Brien (Radiohead) on guitars, Lisa Germano (John Mellencamp) on violin & keyboards, Phil Selway (Radiohead) on drums, and Sebastian Steinberg (Soul Coughing) on bass.

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a 13-year-old leadership and career development firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business  She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where some of her students won the 2018 national competition, were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs, and won the 2019 People’s Choice Award. 

Get in the Game

Baseball by PaulMLocke of Flickr

 

Was it hard to tell this Monday from any other Monday at work?

Can you remember the last time you felt triumphant at work?

Has it been more than three years since your last big professional growth spurt?

Your answers may reveal that you have been coasting. Sometimes we need to coast, like when we are going through big personal challenges. The impacts of these challenges can last a year or two (caring for an ailing elderly relative can take much longer). It can take us out of contention for professional growth and opportunity. There is only so long you can coast before ultimately running out of gas.

It may not be your fault; bad companies and bosses can kill your motivation and inhibit your desire to do more than a job requires.

Regardless, it is against our nature to stay stagnant too long and it can be detrimental to our mental, emotional, and physical health.

Ambition is something that we naturally generate. We can get into situations where we are re-trained to kill our own ambitions, and it can start at a very early age.

Pretty soon we are convincing ourselves that we are fine; the status quo is comfortable; change is unwanted and scary.

My friend since middle school ended a marriage she was unhappy in after she found evidence on Facebook that he was cheating. A couple years later she is very grateful for that evidence, because she may have stayed unhappy even longer without it. She is currently engaged to my brother’s friend, a man I have known since he was a boy, who I know is making her happy, will make her happy, and will be the loyal and affectionate spouse she wanted her ex to be. She said, “You don’t know how unhappy you were until you are happy.”

I do my monthly Epic Career Tales podcast so that people can be inspired by the level of success and happiness that other people have achieved. I know it is not always good to compare yourself with other people, but if you aren’t getting back from a job what you put into it, then you already know that you’re not as happy as you could be. But how do you know how happy you could be unless you compare yourself to how happy other people are?

A lot of you reading this right now have an automatic thought coming through saying, “Yeah, but those people aren’t me. They are [enter any one of the following: smarter, luckier, more privileged, prettier, wealthier, not as busy, more educated, better connected, etc.]”

If you don’t, that is great for you, because you have few reasons not to take action and become happy.

However, if you recognize that thought, that is also great for you, because recognizing it is the first step in taking its power away.

This post is not meant to put you on a path to extreme change in your life so that you can have happiness. I realize that if you have this thought then you also perceive the effort of becoming happy as potentially futile.

You may want to take action, and I encourage it, but effort is something I want you to save until you have a clear vision of what you being happy in your job could look like.

Tony Robbins has said, “Activity without a high-level of purpose is the drain of your fortune.”

So many of my clients are hesitant to picture what it could look like to be happy because they think that it will lead to greater disappointment.

Tony Robbins has also said that our expectations of what our reality should look like can cause our misery.

I just want to leave you with one distinction that might help clear up what seems to be a contradiction.

Be mindful of how you define happiness. The change you think might be necessary in order to achieve this may not be anything external.

Instead of thinking in terms of what you get when better conditions exist, think about you and your current conditions. Picture yourself in the flow, knowing you are at your utmost best and not needing anyone else to notice or recognize you for it.

This is a baby step to get your head back in the game of your career. For now, do not worry about winning the game, and certainly do not think about the championship – just play.

 

If you can generate a sense of happiness even in unfavorable conditions, you can become unstoppable.

 

Is a Prevalent Thought Creating an American Epidemic?

The ultimate source of our happiness by BK of Flickr

The ultimate source of our happiness by BK of Flickr

 

In a MindValley podcast Marisa Peer, once touted as Britain’s best therapist, talked about the prevalence of the thought, “I am not enough.” She discussed its limiting impact on people worldwide. Ms. Peer called it the biggest disease affecting humanity and attributed it not just to unhappiness, but illness. The way she presented this recurring, primarily subconscious thought pattern, she made it sound as if it has reached epidemic proportions.

I wonder if there is a correlation between this prevalent paradigm and an epidemic that drives me to reach as many people as possible with solutions for their career. Though it seems like in previous years discontentment has inched down slightly, Gallup polls still maintain that nearly 70% of Americans are disengaged in their job. This disengagement costs US companies $350 billion per year, according to McLean and Company. I have seen some estimates at $550 billion. I do not know which number is right, but both substantiates an epidemic in my mind and begs the questions, “Why?” and “How do we fix it?”

Companies are not acknowledging this problem. Nor are they harnessing what we know about the brain and human performance optimization to hire appropriately and, once hired, help employees achieve utmost performance.

Workers are operating under an outdated paradigm that dictates work is not supposed to be enjoyable; it is merely what must be done.

People are in the wrong jobs; they either they never discovered their calling, were discouraged from pursuing it, or decided it was unobtainable because they are not enough.

If you consider yourself among the 70% of the disengaged, do you recognize that the underlying belief that you are not enough may have played a part? Then according to Ms. Peer, there are nine steps to mastermind your life and reverse the impact that this belief has had.

 

  1. Know you are enough.
  2. Praise yourself.
  3. Remove destructive criticism.
  4. Mindfully command yourself because your brain does exactly what you think.
  5. Be specific about the rewards you want because your brain moves you away from pain and toward pleasure.
  6. Be purposeful with the pictures and words in your head because they determine your thoughts.
  7. Do what you hate to do to get what you want.
  8. Do not take “no” for an answer.
  9. Take action every day.

 

If I had to boil down her advice to one practical step that has proven to be effective with her patients, herself and her daughter, it is to wake up every morning telling yourself that you are enough. Write it down and keep it visible so that you will see it multiple times throughout the day. Then reaffirm that you are enough at night before you go to bed.

 

As for the other possible causes of the disengagement epidemic, I will save them for future posts. In the meantime, I welcome your comments.

Are there other causes that you see that I have not mentioned? What solutions do you propose?

 

Dedicated to my dad because today is his birthday, and I recently learned he loves the Carpenters.