Ego-driven career decisions are a top reason why some people are successful yet unfulfilled.
Once we take a road in life, we can never really know for certain where the other road may have led. What would we learn if we could see? Perhaps some things would be better and some things would be worse. Which would make us happiest overall? Well, happiness is a choice – kind of.
Happiness is a choice, but it’s not always conscious is what I mean. We don’t always take the time needed to reflect on our choices, the status of our choices, and design the changes we want to see in our lives, then take the necessary actions to realize that change. My clients do.
In fact, reaching out to a coach is a proclamation of your readiness to do something different to create something different.
Yes, you can be unfulfilled with the amount of money you make. While I have helped some of my clients double and triple their income through our work together, helping people fill a money void alone is not personally fulfilling to me. Neither is helping a former CEO “have some fun” as interim turnaround CEO and help him find a role where one of the first things he’ll do is “cut the fat” – aka layoff talent. My personal fulfillment comes from my clients – from their ability to influence positive change that makes the world better.
Just because someone has more noble aspirations doesn’t mean they are choosing them from their Highest Self, however.
Even if your career has been a series of opportunities bestowed upon you, you are still choosing that path – it just hasn’t been conscious or intentional.
The highest level of fulfillment comes from intentionally choosing it.
To determine if you have chosen your path from your Highest Self or your ego, you must determine your “why.” To get to the real why, you may have to ask yourself why several times – maybe up to 7.
For example: Why am I a conscious career and leadership coach (1)?
Because I want to make work better for more people.
Why is this important to me (2)?
Because what happens at work bleeds into other realms of life.
Why do I care (3)?
Because I see the greatest human potential to make the world better being realized when more people are in alignment with their talents, purpose, and vision.
Why is this something to which I dedicate my own career (4)?
Because I feel divinely led to it, as if all of my personal and professional experiences have been positioned to provide me with a micro and macro perspective of a system that achieves maximum results for people and the planet.
Why am I driven to offer this (5)?
Because my/all kids will eventually inherit this earth and all its problems (pending we survive), and I want to do what I can while I’m here to elevate leadership consciousness so that younger generations are given the tools and guidance to solve tomorrow’s problems.
Because that is my legacy.
Because I choose it.
Did you expect it to go there? Does it come down to simple choice?
Well, if you are in your ego, you need to defend your reasons. You need other people to understand and approve of your reasons.
Your Highest Self doesn’t judge you or your reasons. It only seeks to experience the full expression of Itself. That can look many different ways.
Yet, we here, in reality, have actual needs, and not every way we can fully express our highest selves provides those needs. (Or do they?)
Once you let other people’s success standards and expectations move out of the way, the question that is left is – what do I need to be able to fully express my Highest Self? The answer is usually all of those things you need to thrive.
What sabotages our ability to embody the full expression of our Highest Self in our career is often when we fall into self-limiting beliefs about what is possible. This is not your Highest Self talking. Your Highest Self knows how powerful You Are.
Not for comparison’s sake, but for inspiration’s sake, take a look at the people you most admire – did they accept someone else’s beliefs about what was possible?
While your Highest Self is a natural part of Who You Are, our world has many ways of teaching us to suppress it, to doubt it, and to deny it. It takes self-awareness to acknowledge it and discern it from ego. It requires conscious intention and consistent efforts to override ego and put our Highest Selves back at the table when we make major (or minor) decisions for our lives. It often takes practice to filter out all of the noise to hear what our Highest Self is saying. This is why meditation is the “secret” ritual successful and fulfilled people prioritize in their daily lives.
At the table of decisions, we often see the voices of: ego, fear, trauma, other people’s limited beliefs that we bought (and probably sold), our conditioning, our needs, our intuition, and our Highest Self. Realistically, we won’t remove any of those inputs from the table; some of them are automatic and subconscious. We can amplify the voices that tend to create the Highest Good, but we may want to experiment first. This is a great way to break the habit of automatically letting certain inputs influence our decision. Journal to record the voices, your process of choosing, and the outcomes. Much like being present with the beauty of nature by zooming in can interrupt a negative mental spiral and create new neural pathways, being present with the thoughts and inputs in decision-making will enable you to create new habits that create better outcomes.
This won’t become an instant habit. It will take what every other habit has taken – your intention, proclamation, interrupting your current habits, reminding yourself to do it the new way, and fighting through the discomfort and inertia that is inherent with change, until it becomes the default way. Or hypnosis (if you like to accelerate it.)
If you want some help tuning into your Highest Self and forging a career path ahead that enables full self-expression and fulfillment, schedule a consultation today.
Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a 13-year-old leadership and career development firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play.
While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales.
Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot.
She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where some of her students won the 2018 national competition, were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs, and won the 2019 People’s Choice Award.