Shake Off Shame of Unmet 2018 Goals Before You Set New Goals

 

If you have any amount of ambition, you set goals.  Setting goals can be formal and structured, even coached, or it can be just a daydream that becomes an intention. If you do the former, then you have a written record of your 2018 goals. If the latter, take a bit of time right now to write down what you had hoped to accomplish in 2018, even if it was progress toward something you hope to happen in 2019 and beyond.

It’s time to review them before you set new goals for 2019. How does this make you feel?

If you’re excited to take them out, then you probably feel like or know that you have been consistently disciplined and motivated in taking action toward your goals, so you are probably confident that you reached all or most or came pretty close.  Take a look at the goals you didn’t achieve and if you experience any physiological changes when switching from your achieved goals to your unachieved goals, read on. If not, just keep doing what you did, and consider teaching it to the 97% of people who don’t engage in formal goal setting.

If you feel hesitant, if there is any inkling that you are afraid to look, you are already experiencing shame about potentially unmet 2018 goals.

It’s okay.  Just notice how you feel and note your awareness. There’s no sense in feeling shameful about feeling shameful. Give yourself 90 seconds to really be with this emotion. Notice where in your body you feel it.  It might be your forehead if your unmet goals lead to worry about the consequences. You might feel it in your shoulders and neck, or your chest or your stomach, but don’t be surprised if pain shows up somewhere unexpected, like a knee or fingers.

Once you’ve taken this time to allow these emotions to be, feel proud that you honored these emotions. Feel your heart open and send thoughts of gratitude for this new awareness, which you will use to set goals that are achievable and in alignment with your highest good.

Take a deep breath in, imagining that the new breath is new resolve, and then breathe out focusing on the spot where the sensations were the most intense and imagine the emotion is being channeled out. Take two more deep breaths, imagining that the resolve is now filling the space where the emotions were.

Now that you have allowed this energy to be in motion (“e-motion”) you will be able to review last year’s goals with a clearer mind and less judgment, which will enable you to better assess why you really didn’t achieve them. This is what’s really important in setting new goals that you are more likely to achieve.

If you don’t allow your energy to move, you might be inclined to be defensive and look at circumstances that prevented you from achieving your goals, which is fine, but ultimately leaves you disempowered to circumstances.

If you allow the shame to move through you, you can more clearly see where you could have been at cause for the outcomes, good or bad. It will be easier to take accountability without feeling self-blame. You become a better problem solver because you are now dealing with a reality you control, so you set up systems that enable you to achieve your goals, even with unfavorable circumstances. Take into consideration these and other potential circumstances, and make the plan now on how you will deal with them in 2019.

You may have already heard that you are 42% more likely to achieve your goals when you write them down. Additionally, Harvard Business School found that the 3% of MBA graduates who wrote down their goals earned 10X more than the 97% that didn’t over a 10-year period.

There are a ton of great goal guides and calendars or you can break down your goals into various project parts and milestones and put them into a project management app that will send you notifications like Asana.  You may also use the SMART method that I taught business students at Drexel University. You can also engage a coach like me to give you extra customized guidance and provide you with monthly external accountability some people need to maintain their progress.

Elle King – Shame (Official Video)

‘Shake the Spirit’ available now: http://smarturl.it/ShakeTheSpirit?IQid=yt iTunes: http://smarturl.it/xShame/itunes?IQid=yt Apple: http://smarturl.it/xShame/applemusic?IQid=yt Spotify: http://smarturl.it/xShame/spotify?IQid=yt Amazon:http://smarturl.it/xShame/az?IQid=yt Tidal: http://smarturl.it/xShame/tidal?IQid=yt Google Play:http://smarturl.it/xShame/googleplay?IQid=yt Follow Elle King: https://www.facebook.com/ElleKingMusic https://twitter.com/ElleKingMusic http://instagram.com/elleking http://elleking.com/ Directed by: Dano Cerny

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business, will be an Associate Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department in 2019,  and is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where her students won the 2018 national competition and were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs.

 

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