Mindfulness

Can You Get To 10 Out of 10?

 

I love rating scales because it can instantly bring awareness of gaps as well as increases in confidence, performance, and satisfaction. My clients sign off that their branded content, whether a résumé, LinkedIn profile, biography or cover letter is a 10 out of 10 before it becomes final.

When I first start speaking with a prospective client a key question I ask is how they rate their momentum toward their next goal on a scale of 1-10. If they’re already at a 7+, it’s clear they have a lot working in their favor already and they’re looking to make sure that they can sustain such momentum or give it a small boost. If they’re anywhere lower, which most are, it’s critical that I diagnose why their momentum is so low and devise a plan that will get them to a 9 or 10 within a three month period.

Last week I asked my students to rate their confidence in interviewing before and after they did group peer mock interviews. This was an experimental format and I wanted to know if it was effective. Their ratings proved that it was effective at bumping them up a notch or two, so that everyone was at least a 7+.  Then I asked, “What will it take for you to feel like a 10.”

A few interesting things were revealed.

Most of them wanted to be interviewed by ME, believing that it would more closely mimic an employer interview because my experience would lead me to ask harder questions and they would be more nervous about my opinion since I give them a grade.

So, they felt confident and more comfortable but wanted to be put into more stressful conditions to really test their performance. I thought this was a very self-aware and astute observation, indicating to me that they truly had gained more confidence, but wanted to challenge themselves.

Another revelation for one student was that she didn’t feel she would ever be a 10. Wow! This was a truly courageous revelation to acknowledge and share. It was an opportunity to further increase their self-awareness of how their belief systems influence their behavior.

It may be a Job Search and Preparation course, but if I only focused on the pragmatic steps of job search, the students would not apply the steps with integrity, achieve the outcomes I intend for them or acquire the life skill of being accountable for their own success. With Cabrini’s blessing, I also incorporate into the course science-based mindfulness, emotional intelligence, mindset management, interpersonal communication and influence, and project management.

If this or any of these students maintain the belief that they will not achieve the ultimate whatever (job, lifestyle, confidence, self-image, etc.), their brain’s motivational systems will fail to fire and they will become victims of confirmation bias, never realizing that the “evidence” they see, and that their ultimate X is impossible because of a filter that they programmed.

While they are learning how to use storytelling to influence others into action (in their major and in their job search,) they are now getting more clear about the stories that formed their beliefs and how those beliefs and stories are shaping their behavior and their results in life.

This student’s homework, which was suggested for any and all students, was to journal with the intention of identifying the source of the story that she would never reach 10, and in doing so recognizing it as a story, not a truth. Then I also shared with them a video about how to reinforce a different story – a story in which they are their best selves enjoying all of the success, joy, and outcomes that coincide with the belief of being worthy and capable of reaching 10.

Where do you rate yourself in various realms of your life?

Do you hold the belief that 10 is unreachable?

If 10 is possible (which it is), what gaps need to be filled in to experience that?

 

Unknown Brain – Perfect 10 (Lyrics) feat. Heather Sommer

🎧 Your Home For The Best Electronic Music With Lyrics! Unknown Brain – Perfect 10 (feat. Heather Sommer) Lyrics / Lyric Video brought to you by WaveMusic ⏬ Download Unknown Brain – Perfect 10 (feat. Heather Sommer) here: http://ncs.io/P10ID ⚡️Honey I’m a perfect 10 🔔 Click the bell to stay updated on the best Lyrics / Lyric Videos from WaveMusic!

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business  She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where her students won the 2018 national competition and were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs.

How to Manage a Job Search on Top of it All

 

Before I start, let me be completely transparent- I do NOT have it all together. I feel overwhelmed and behind sometimes (many times.) And, I know I’m not alone – by far!

Also, let me give you kudos for taking on change. While I am sure there will be a great payoff for your efforts, in the meantime it can be quite scary. Our brain doesn’t like change. It tries to protect us with stress responses. This physiologically can limit our brain’s ability to handle stress we’d otherwise feel completely capable of handling, but you are growing and developing. It will feel like quite the bumpy ride until you adjust and form new habits to support new activity.

Just stay mindful – allow the stress. Welcome it, even. Dare I say be grateful for it. Forgive yourself for things that slip through the cracks. You’re learning to handle more, new things. You will find a rhythm as long as you can override your brain’s resistance and follow the tips I share here.

We all know by now that self-care is critical. That being said, we need support in doing so. I can’t just run off to the spa. Someone has to get done what I’d normally be getting done, like picking up the kids, or whatever (I’m getting overwhelmed just thinking about it.)

SET BOUNDARIES

Also, I’m self-employed, so technically I make my own schedule. However, that gives other people the illusion that I have more time, when really what it means that ANY time I am not working, I am missing earning opportunities, and money goes out the door. I am the only person who can create and enforce boundaries around my time, so I have to do just that. Sometimes I have to say no to things that I really want to do. It took some practice saying no to things I felt I “had to do.” If you’re an obliger, a la Gretchen Rubin’s 4 Tendencies, this is definitely against your nature, but necessary to avoid burnout.

ASK FOR/ACCEPT SUPPORT

Sometimes I feel as though people think I should be giving more support to them, so I don’t ask for it as often as I really need it, and by the time I do, I am in bad shape. It’s a cycle I recognize and am trying to break. I have to love myself through that. I’m also trying to stop martyring myself for the things I take on while silently overwhelmed. It’s my own standard for myself that causes such inner conflict.

If any of this martyring or self-neglect sounds familiar to you, quit it. Maybe like me, you learned somewhere that it was wrong to ask for help. I heard someone call this “rugged individualism” in a MindValley masterclass last week. She was referring to a value growing in popularity in America that is causing increasing loneliness at epidemic levels. Vishen Lakhiani, MindValley’s founder, reported, and research supports, that loneliness has been found to be more lethal than 15 cigarettes a day. According to studies it contributes to suicide, which seems pretty common sense. But did you know that it’s also linked to Alzheimer’s disease, immune and cardio-vascular deficiencies, and neuroendocrine changes?

Perhaps we need to be better at reaching out for help, and perhaps if we receive more help we’ll feel more capable and willing to give help to others. What I have experienced is that too many of us feel incapable of handling helping others because we don’t feel supported. So, people you ask may not give you support for this reason. And you may feel hesitant to ask someone you feel is overwhelmed themselves. Getting a no might feel worse than trying to cope on your own. If your mental state is already fragile, it can be hard to not make that “no” mean something about you – you’re unworthy, unlikeable, doomed, etc.

Somehow, this cycle has to break. Go about asking for support with the expectation that you might get 1 yes for every 10 nos, and it has nothing to do with you. Everyone is fighting a battle you can’t see. Vow to be supportive of others once you get yourself stabilized and follow through.

MAKE TIME FOR REFLECTION/MINDFULNESS

I have become aware of my tendencies through reflection, journaling, meditation, and personal development immersion. However, the awareness at first is painful. Again, I have to allow that pain and be grateful for it because it means I am growing. I don’t always have time for this reflection. That, I feel, is the biggest danger in society today. So many of us are too busy to consider how we can respond better to stress, conflict, etc., so we defend our actions and opinions fiercely. This stifles our emotional intelligence and leads to continued conflict.

I know – on top of making time for job search activities I’m also suggesting that you make time for reflection and emotional health. That might seem like a bit much, but if you are going to expand your capacity to do anything, you have to mind your mind. Going through the motions of your job search activities and a campaign is a surefire way to get mediocre results and prolong landing. So much of your success depends on the impression that you give other people. You have to be “on” most of the time.

Facing some disappointments isn’t necessarily inevitable, but it is to be expected. Mindfulness promotes resilience so that you can bounce back sooner, and reflecting will help you recognize how you can perform better next time.

LEVELING UP

Besides just making sure that you are mentally, physically, and emotionally rested to handle the added stress, you can also level up your capacity by mastering flow. Flow is a word that describes a heightened state of mind that occurs when you are fully immersed in an activity and your skills express themselves subconsciously, without conscious effort. What neuroscience has taught us is that we can recreate this state of mind, which we normally experience with activities that we enjoy deeply, to tackle more challenges with ease. Perhaps it doesn’t seem like the time to take on learning a whole different skill set. That might be true. It could also be true, however, that if you invest time in the front end learning and applying a fraction of the practical science of flow that your job search will be accelerated and help you land an even more ideal scenario. Is it smarter to use your time to start whacking away at the tree you want felled, or is it smarter to sharpen the ax first? Is it smarter to plan ahead to where you want the tree to go and make precise cuts to direct the tree where it’s safe to land? Which brings me to my next tip:

KNOW YOUR TARGET

Even if you’re desperate to land quickly and even if you think that any situation is better than the one you’re in, I’ve witnessed too many hasty, but “successful” searches result in a cascade of even worse scenarios. Don’t assume that you can’t afford to be picky; you can’t afford to NOT be picky! Don’t assume that you’ll land faster if you set your goals lower. As good as you think you can fake being motivated, most employers see past this, and they’ll look right past you to candidates who aren’t at risk of disengagement. You’re more likely to land a job that excites you, and good employers want to give employees opportunities to grow and expand.

Your brain knows better, and you need to leverage every brain hack known today to keep up your motivation to face challenges. That requires having a goal that excites you. Even if you achieve 80% of your ideal scenario, you’ll enjoy a much better outcome than targeting only what you think is achievable. Challenge yourself on this. Assuming what’s easy is best is just your brain protecting you from scary change. You can handle it!

HABITS and BELIEFS – OUT WITH THE OLD; IN WITH THE NEW

Mindfulness usually leads us to make new discoveries about why we have fallen short of our goals in the past, and in most cases, it’s 1 of 2 things: Habits or beliefs. Both of these either takes discipline to change, or hypnosis to change – your choice. Hypnosis is safe (though vastly misunderstood) and quick. Discipline takes longer, but proving you have discipline can help you unlock greater confidence. Just don’t conclude that you can’t achieve something because you fell short in discipline. Hypnosis is still an option. So many people turn to hypnosis as a last resort only to wish they’d done it sooner.

There are a ton of devices and apps available to keep you reminded and on track if you choose discipline.

Of course, you may also want to engage a partner who will help you make sure the time you have to invest in your job search is invested in the wisest most results-producing resources and activities, who will offer emotional support and help you find other kinds of support, and who is experienced, trained and certified in modalities that support habit development. (Wink, wink 😉

 

The Police – So Lonely Video

Listen to more from The Police: https://ThePolice.lnk.to/Essentials Explore the incredible history of The Police and this classic song here: http://www.udiscovermusic.com/artists/the-police Listen to The Police playlists here: http://playlists.udiscovermusic.com/playlist/the-police-best-of Experience The Police on Half Speed Mastered Vinyl LP: https://lnk.to/CfAvq Music video by The Police performing So Lonely. (C) 1980 A&M Records Ltd.

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business  She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where her students won the 2018 national competition and were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs.

Why Recruiters Ask You Questions That Your Résumé Clearly Answers Already

 

Have you, like many other job seekers, noticed that it seems sometimes like recruiters, maybe even hiring managers, ask you questions that have clearly been answered already in your résumé?

Like, “Do you have experience with business intelligence tools?” while your last position was “Business Intelligence Analyst.”

You’re getting all kinds of advice from career coaches like me to do your research and come to interviews prepared to intelligently talk about the company’s specific goals or challenges, but you get to the interview and it feels like you’re just interview number 9 today, not their potential next highly valued employee.

Experiences like this are just one of the hundreds of gripes that I see job seekers making online, and I have been collecting them for over a year now. (I also procure gripes from recruiters about job seekers, recruiters about HR, recruiters about hiring managers, HR about recruiters, HR about hiring managers, and hiring managers about HR – what a mess!)

I have to admit that as a recruiter, I have been guilty of this. Here’s what happened:

  • I had a third party recruiting firm play bate and switch with me, sending candidates to interviews who didn’t match the résumés they presented. As a result, I made a bad hire that I had to replace for the client. From that point on, I always asked clients to validate what was on their résumé. Once you uncover deception, you become skeptical. Once you get burned, you become cynical. I’d rather have a candidate insulted that I was asking them questions that I should have already known from their résumé than hire someone who was misrepresenting their skills and qualifications.
  • Coincidentally, I had some very indignant candidates who were quite put off that I would ask them such questions. The worse they took this experience, the more I worried about their temperament. I had candidates who seemed completely professional in their interviews get to the client, have a bad experience, and completely lose their cool, as well as their chances with that client and me. I also had a candidate I referred to another firm get escorted out by security for becoming threatening. In this day and age of employee sabotage and mass shootings, a person’s temperament is always being evaluated.
  • From time to time as a recruiter on top of still needing to fill hot job requirements, you have to put fires out, such as when my candidate was fired and needed to be replaced. Sometimes I was not as prepared for a candidate interview as I liked to be. I would normally just be upfront about this and apologize. Under stress, however, I might not have been as empathetic. I had some bad days as a recruiter, and I may have come off as aloof, scattered, or insensitive.  I wasn’t my best self, and all I can do is aim to be better. I’m a decade (plus) older and much more emotionally intelligent than I was then. Not all recruiters get how their candidates’ experience affects their long-term success, and even if they do, they can’t always buck the broken system and fix their candidate experience. I’d like to think that eventually, especially if the candidates’ job market continues, more recruiters will have to evaluate and improve how they treat candidates, acknowledging them as people, not commodities.
  • Résumés are rarely written to include “behind the scenes” details that demonstrate and prove a candidate’s qualifications. Often it’s a list of what a candidate was supposed to do, not what they did or how well they did it. So, a phone screen or interview was your opportunity to tell a compelling story that demonstrated your value. The résumé was just a tool to get me to invite you to an interview. If you have qualities and skills I felt would impress the client, the résumé also had to inspire the client to interview you, but I need to take it up a level. You may have stated that you did something on your résumé, but I need to know more to enhance the résumé. AND, I need you to be able to articulate your experience to the hiring manager and other stakeholders. I’m not just making sure you have the experience required; I’m making sure you can effectively communicate this to me, and therefore others.

I’m definitely not condoning recruiters’ negligence to understand a candidate’s experience prior to an interview; it goes against common sense best practices. However, I find the volume and extremity of the gripes I have been procuring online for over a year now to be disturbing and discouraging.  Solutions that truly disrupt and overturn the broken system cannot be devised until all parties involved in hiring and careering can understand the other parties’ perspectives. I don’t want to take sides; I want to bring the sides together.

This may or may not ease your frustration with the recruiter experience, but ultimately you are absolutely capable of landing your next job without them, and you will probably find those activities much more enjoyable. Eliminate or manage as many stressors as possible so that YOU can be your best self more of the time. If you want to know how to execute a career campaign without recruiters, schedule a free consultation.

If you want to learn how to get recruiters to call you back MORE often, download my free report.

 

This World Fair “Don’t Make Me Wait” from Disturbia

Get it at iTunes: http://bit.ly/DisturbiaMusic CD: http://bit.ly/DistCD SUBSCRIBE: http://www.youtube.com/LakeshoreRecords This World Fair “Don’t Make Me Wait” music video. From the movie and Soundtrack to DISTURBIA. www.LAKESHORE-RECORDS.com

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer, Certified Career Transition Consultant, and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She is an Adjunct Professor in Cabrini University’s Communications Department and previously was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business  She is also an Instructor for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy where her students won the 2018 national competition and were named America’s Next Top Young Entrepreneurs.

We Are In Big Trouble If Leaders Don’t Start Doing This

Reflections

How do we shift from a world where rampant mental illness pushes people to the limits of their humanity to a world where we take good care of one another?

Could it be as simple as breathing??

Letting go?

Healing?

Processing?

Allowing?

Surrendering?

Choosing happiness?

Self-reflection may be simple, but it’s not easy.

I cherish my time for self-reflection. Without it, I tend to stay in a stressful loop. In a moment I might start to go down a rabbit hole, thinking about an interaction that I had or have to have. Without time to process these thoughts fully, they just stay in a loop.

There is something I am supposed to get from these repeating thoughts, which is why my brain keeps showing me it. I need to reveal it’s meaning, process my emotions about it, and then put it behind me as completed. If not, my energy gets sapped. I find it hard to focus and all tasks take longer. I may even procrastinate or escape into TV or social media. Still that thought loops.

It’s like when you are running late for something and you keep going back to your house for different things you forgot and it just gets later and later. Ever do that? Be in such a rush that you forget important things and it causes you to be even later?

I notice that if tasks and obligations, including my cherished kids and clients, keep me from giving these thoughts my full attention for a while, I start to resent them. I get short tempered. I set up boundaries to protect myself. I have more freedom to do so because I am self-employed. Still, when I accept work, I make a commitment and that commitment has to be fulfilled. I don’t always see a busy time coming and I get stuck

However, companies need to adopt a self-care culture to allow their people to grow and develop not just skill wise, but in their consciousness. Our planet actually depends on it!

Otherwise, we get unconscious producers in power, focused only on producing hard results without consideration of consequences. This explains situational greed, a neuroscience concept I introduced in a previous blog in which the brain starts to rewire itself to pursue more power and/and possessions, sometimes even becoming addicted to the dopamine release of acquiring more power and/or possessions. Without being able to regularly take time, which becomes even harder as you take on more responsibility and authority, this can go unchecked and lead to a host of toxic conditions and detrimental consequences.

Without that time, I could not have written this!

A balance, however elusive, appears to be the more accurate place from which to make critical decisions that impact many.

Not work-life balance, but production and reflection balance. An employer can’t assume its employees are doing this at home.

This is a generalization, but often those at the top of the income chain employ the assistance of others to take care of admin/housekeeping, even child rearing. But do they use the time that is freed from those tasks for reflection? Or, do they use that time to produce or feed ego?

Most other people, including top producers, are going home and attacking a busy kid activity and homework schedule plus a home care task list. Then they zone out consuming media because they are mentally and emotionally exhausted – another generalization, I realize.

Still, I think it’s fair to say the general workforce is not in the habit of making time for self-reflection, and if they are, they doing it incompletely and getting stuck in the loop I described above.

The loops below are a much better model for conscious growth, whether you are a leader or a producer:

Achieving Conscious Leadership

 

  1. Consumption – Make plans based on new insights, illuminations, teachings
  2. Reflection – Consider how people and planet will be impacted directly and indirectly
  3. Production – Set goals and intentions and execute
  4. Reflection – Examine direct and indirect impacts, as well as own performance relative to higher self

The key is self-intimacy (into-me-I-see). Not just asking how was it, evaluating in terms of results, profits, etc., but asking how was I. Sometimes the answers aren’t good, and the ego doesn’t like them.

But the higher self, the one who wants to continually evolve into a better and better person, a better leader and a more positive influence on the people around them, needs them.

Coincidentally, I came across this warning signs list this morning. I thought someone might need this more than music, so I’m sharing it.

https://www.higherperspectives.com/warning-signs-nervous-breakdown-2610845741.html

What Emotional Intelligence and Mindfulness Training ISN’T

By Bruce Mars

Woman_mirror

Why is emotional intelligence suddenly so touted as a major leadership skill?

Because we know a lot more about what makes people tick, what motivates them, and what inspires top performance than we ever did before. HINT: It’s not the old dominant intimidation model that helped the moguls of the past become monopolists (Ford, Rockefeller, Carnegie.)

Industry was built by men during a time when being a man meant being tough, not showing weakness (by ways of emotions,) making decisions and demanding compliance, or else. The line between respect and fear was very thin.

Research done in 2005 proves that greedy entrepreneurs have less customer and employee satisfaction.

The more a leader gives freely, the more they will inspire trust and reciprocated financial and emotional rewards. The more they create a climate of lack, the more survival instincts will lead to cut-throat competitiveness that kills collaboration.

I mean, science does tell us this, but common sense might also tell you that starving people of rest, sleep, joy, living wages, and sometimes actual food will inhibit their performance. But that doesn’t mean that it’s common sense to make sure that your employees get ample rest, sleep, food, vacation time, fun, and money. That sounds like common sense, right?

What about starving people from being heard, having a voice, growing in contribution, having and expressing emotions, and being human?

We are learning more about what it means to be human and what it means to be an optimized human. So much has been discovered about the brain and its relationship with the mind, body, and spirit.

Did you know there actually is a part of your brain related to spirit? The insula and anterior cingulate, which also help you process social dilemmas. These are “newer” parts of our brain, evolutionarily. However, they are also parts of the brain we didn’t know much about, especially the implications of its clinical function, when many of today’s leaders were in college. And, these areas don’t fully develop until well into your third decade of life, unless this is accelerated (and development can be with practices that take mere minutes daily.) In fact, while they are the slowest developing parts of our brain, they are critical to helping us with perception, morality, and virtues.

So, it would stand to reason that this type of training certainly benefits everyone, especially younger professionals, and perhaps even students.

However, a major focus is on leaders for obvious top-down reasons, like the fact that a leader is more effective when he or she leads by example, and leaders are expected to set the tone for the culture. But also, science now recognizes that as someone grows in ambition, they may express what is being called situational greed. Greed can contribute to amassing wealth, but can also cause people to act unfairly and selfishly, which will inspire altruistic punishment instead of cooperation and collaboration. It can also lead to full-blown crisis, such as the great recession. It needs to be kept in check, and for that, awareness is necessary. So, emotional intelligence and mindfulness training will also prevent leaders from a well-documented inclination that can lead to decisions that inspire low satisfaction, disengagement, and even sabotage.

On the upside…

What would be possible for your company if all of your employees could be trusted to act in the highest good of the company, its people, and its employees?

What would happen if, instead of having leaders who were able to leverage the strengths of his or her team, you have a team that can leverage each others’ strengths?

If this seems like a pie in the sky outcome, you may need to readjust your expectations of what is possible, and even what’s probable when you focus on enhancing individual self-awareness and empathy.

Think about all of the measures you take now to handle conflicts, ensure compliance, and mitigate human-based risks. You’ve been playing defense. I invite you to see what’s possible when you employ EI/MT (Emotional Intelligence/Mindfulness) training and start playing offense.

Small ripples create big, transformative waves.

What is EI/MT NOT?

It’s not just explaining etiquette. It’s not teaching ethics. It’s not a new way to make some people feel inferior or superior. It’s not going to make your employees “soft.” It’s not suppressing or denying emotions or emotional responses. It’s not a way to avoid conflict.

In fact, it’s going to help your employees become more self-sufficient at facilitating non-judgmental communications and consensus building. They will crave collaboration, think more creatively, and have healthier relationships with their emotions.

I have seen mindfulness be misapplied and misused to discourage people from disputing management decisions that seem to not be in the highest good. I have also seen people employ mindfulness and meditation to escape their emotions. These misuses backfire in big ways. The first is really bordering on mental abuse, and the second will lead to physical symptoms and illness. What we resist persists. Emotions need to be embraced and allowed. What the training does is release emotional bottlenecks and give them a more appropriate and healthful way to flow. It also increases awareness of the emotions so that decision making is done in an enhanced state of mind.

I have also seen those who have the training make others who are struggling emotionally feel like they need fixing. If you have been playing defense, the introduction of these trainings risks imposing these feelings. There is a way to introduce these trainings to your workforce that will help them embrace the changes and get excited about all that is possible for them rather than making them feel like they are joining a woo woo club of spiritual elitists.

Finally, these practices may produce a flow state, but that doesn’t mean that your workforce will suddenly become “soft” and unable or unwilling to deal with pressure. In fact, mindfulness has been proven to increase resilience.

I know a lot has been floating around about trainings of this type, which are not new, but have now at least been proven by small and large organizations to have a positive impact. If your interest is piqued, reach out to schedule a consultation and learn how EI and Mindfulness training can enhance your work experience and outcomes and those of your team.

Edie Brickell & New Bohemians – What I Am

Music video by Edie Brickell & New Bohemians performing What I Am. (C) 1988 Geffen Records

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. 

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Career Transition Consultant and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business and recently instructed for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy at Cabrini College, where her students won the national competition and were named America’s Top Young Entrepreneurs.

Evaluating Your Workforce for Potential Troublemakers

Office SpaceReverse Engineering Internal Sabotage for Prevention [Part 3 of 3; Click for Part 1 and Part 2]

Remember Milton from Office Space? That poor guy. All he wanted was his red stapler to stop getting taken. AND, they kept moving him to the basement, AND, he stopped receiving his paycheck. I hate to spoil this movie for you, even though I’d have to imagine everyone has seen it, but let’s just say, neglect is a primary ingredient for sabotage.

(Fun fact: That Swingline red stapler didn’t exist until the movie and now it’s a best seller!)

Once you know that your hiring process allowed a saboteur to get through the screening process, how do you make sure that the rest of your workforce is on the up and up without insulting those of higher values and morals?

I suspect strongly that the majority of employees will also want to make sure that there are no additional internal saboteurs. After all, the mission they hopefully feel so aligned with is at stake, and so is their job, essentially.

But at a larger organization, there are, statistically speaking, going to be those who feel like they have earned trust and may feel as though measures to test trust are for other people who have not yet proven themselves trustworthy. Another objection will be any time it may take, especially in organizations like Elon Musk‘s that are already stretching their workforce very thin.

You have to be able to make the argument that everyone is subject to same evaluations, including the top level. As with everything else these days, transparency is the key to earning buy in from your talent.

What kind of evaluation could you use that would be fair and accurate in finding clues to values and behaviors that could lead to sabotage without making people feel like they’re not allowed to be human and make mistakes? There are several

I mean, someone who has an inherent bias isn’t necessarily somebody who will commit corporate espionage, and bias itself is human. It’s when bias is used to make decisions that it becomes a problem.

How many people could you really afford to lose all at once if your evaluations determine that the screening process let in multiple people? How much do you really want to know? Some people will leave before ish hits the fan, because every day will feel like a witchhunt, and even if they have done everything up to snuff, they might still wonder if a standardized test, which many have good reasons to be skeptical of, will pick up something anomalous.

According to Tesla’s Glassdoor reviews, it seems to employees perceive that people get let go on the spur of the moment, for no known reason [known to them.] So, you can imagine how pervasive this fear would become if suddenly the company wanted to dig deeper. [I’ll put a post on how fear for your job inhibits an organization’s growth on the “on deck” list.]

The evaluation for this situation is a core value assessment, but it’s usually given during the interview process, not after your workforce is onboarded, let alone tenured for any significant amount of time. As for which are the best for weeding out potential troublemakers in your workforce?

As I mentioned in part one, all humans have the potential for altruistic punishment. So, if you’re really going to weed out people with the potential to act on desire for justice, you’re going to lose your whole workforce

Are engagement surveys going to identify how unfairly employees feel policies and leadership are? They are designed to, but there are problems with engagement surveys, though – especially if people already fear for their jobs, they are not likely to be very honest, these are traditionally done annually, and there’s the issue of time that it takes to complete vs. how long a company actually executes on data gathered. [Contact us to identify the best employee engagement survey for you for help implementing a plan that will lead to optimal engagement improvements.]

Plus, do you even need an assessment or survey when your Glassdoor profile clearly expresses employee concerns?

Even if your Glassdoor profile isn’t accurately reflecting employee concerns, what would it take to be properly alerted to fringe behavior, but still maintain a culture that keeps talent engaged?

It comes down to resetting your culture.

In a radio interview on Executive Leaders Radio that I was invited to observe, Shal Jacobovitz, CEO of CiVi BIopharma, put it simply – talent issues are either based on will, skill, or values. As a leader he can develop skills and inspire will, but when issues were due to a mismatch of values, they had to part ways.

In my professional opinion and based on logic, you can’t expect that your whole workforce will comply with a values evaluation without diminishing your culture and trust at a critical time when trust really needs to be rebuilt.

The best way to lessen the chances that any individuals within your workforce inclined toward altruistic punishment are more inclined to leave peacefully, be rehabilitated, or identified and fairly eliminated without incident is to reset the culture to be based on commitment to the mission, shared values, and mutual trust and respect.

Core Value Assessments don’t do this, though they can help you hire people more in alignment, but engagement surveys might, as long as data remains anonymous and transparent action is taken to address workforce complaints and suggestions.

If suspicious activity is identified by employees, there needs to be a TRULY anonymous channel people can use and a thorough due diligence process to validate any claims.

Altruistic punishment can also be carried out between employees, not just from employee to employer. People will take matters into their own hands if they don’t feel they will be properly and adequately addressed.

All people make mistakes. Good people make poor judgments sometimes. Don’t expect to rid your workforce of mistakes or poor judgments, or even bias; you can simply raise awareness around them and ensure that bias doesn’t drive decisions.

Don’t punish employees for having opinions about how things could be better or feelings about how things are.

Instead aim to cultivate a culture where people can be authentic and imperfect, where it’s safe to bring problems out into the open so that they can be resolved, and then make all reasonable efforts to resolve them.

Be transparent about expectations and give people room to live up to them. Give them a reason to be their best, and show them faith that you know they will be. This isn’t fluffy hippie love I’m selling here – it’s science. In 1964, Harvard professor Robert Rosenthal conducted an experiment that proved that teachers’ expectations influence how students perform.

It does no good to label an employee as a potential troublemaker. Consider them human, first, because if they really are a threat, they can still be threat to you externally, and how handle their opinions and feelings will determine just how much of a threat they stay, inside or outside. Acknowledge effort over intelligence, and you will get your best efforts from your workforce.

Troublemaker- Weezer

1st song off of Weezer’s Red Album! Now I decided “Whoa, this need lyrics” so I drank some coffee, broke five pencils, and let the copy and paste process do the talking. God, that was a lot of work! (No, I’m just being easy. lol) Here’s the lyrics!

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play.

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales.

 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Career Transition Consultant and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot.

 

She was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business and recently instructed for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy at Cabrini College, where her students won the national competition and were named America’s Top Young Entrepreneurs.

Engaging The Ones Who Didn’t Get The Promotion

Reverse Engineering Internal Sabotage for Prevention [Part 2 of 3]

How can you choose the right person for promotion, but still make sure that those who didn’t receive a promotion stay engaged and working in the company‘s best interests?

There are three branches to this answer:

#1 – Make sure that the decision to promote someone was based on criteria that everyone would consider fair. You learned last week that the perception that a company or person has been unfair is what can trigger altruistic punishment.

#2 – Keep the talent engaged in alternative possibilities for growth.

#3 – Be mindful of the place from which you communicate.

So let’s just take a look at a fair process, and I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt that you already know that bias has no place in selecting talent.

It can be stressful to be the one who has to choose between highly qualified and valuable talents for a promotion. Ultimately, two factors have to be taken into consideration – A) Is this talent going to perform the best in this role, and in order for A to be a yes, you have to also consider B) Is this position the best next step in this talent’s career.

This implies that a manager would have to be familiar with the career aspirations of his or her team members. As a best practice, this would be part of the annual review process. Unfortunately, if a company has minimal resources and growth is at a critical point, the prospect of exploring potential future opportunities within an organization with the talent seems like an exercise in imagination, so it will be avoided until performance, profit, and plans can accommodate growth. Seems logical, but it neglects to address the driving force of engagement among top talent – growth.

Referring back to my post on the success science of optimism, it’s not only okay to operate with optimism, it’s critical to success. While the nature of business does require planning for contingencies, the more you operate within the realm of optimism, the more motivated, engaged, and productive talent will be. It doesn’t require a lot of time to talk about your talents’ aspirations, but it does require trust. Sometimes, having a third party (like Epic Careering) come in for career development is necessary. People may fear for their job security if they suspect their aspirations will be a reason to be overlooked for positions, or even worse, let go. No one likes being put in a box, and sometimes the best opportunities are the ones that don’t look as expected. This is another reason why many companies neglect to incorporate professional development into their talent management practices, or why the focus is always on potentially limited growth opportunities within the company. When the process policies are based more on fear than on the best interests of the talent, fears become reality and top talent leaves for greater growth opportunities anyway.

Whether the manager or a 3rd party go through this process, give talent reasons to believe that opportunities will exist in alignment with their aspirations. Then, follow through. Work strategically among other leaders in the organization to bridge the present conditions with future aspirations. Even if it’s giving the employee an opportunity to attend a conference outside the industry, and then assigning them to come back with 1-3 ideas that could be applicable to the business. This also implies that they already know where the business is going.

This brings us to #2. When telling an employee that he or she was not selected for a promotion, keep focusing on the path ahead. Connecting the dots between where employees are and where they want to be can be challenging from within the organization. Again, a third party (like Epic Careering) may be able to propose ideas based on greater depth with the client and high-level perspective on the business/industry. Often the stretch an organization makes to make growth opportunities available for its talent is what opens up a new competitive edge. Engage employees in future possibilities. Like R&D, some things may not pan out, but your commitment to finding a way to best leverage their talents and aspirations will earn trust, engagement, and loyalty.

Don’t make it all about the company, but do share how particular skills (hard or soft) or experiences were perceived as integral for moving the company forward. Stick to explaining the assets you and other stakeholders weighed. Make sure the employee knows the reasons he or she was being considered in the first place.

#3 – Frank feedback is very tricky business.

Before you sit down with an employee that was not granted a promotion, check where your communication is coming from. Communication was my major in college, and that included learning broadcasting, journalism, public speaking, and advertising, but it also included interpersonal communication. It seems like this would be something you pick up during the course of your life, but consider all that can go wrong in communication. Yes, I learned a lot about communication, but I had the most breakthroughs in communication in my own life in Landmark Education’s Communication Curriculum. The most significant revelation that had the most impact in my life was when I realized that what we can control in communication is the most critical part of sending communications that land – the emotions behind them.

Take a few moments to be centered and mindful. Notice and let go of any feelings of pity, regret, defensiveness, judgments of the person’s mistakes or shortcomings, and fears. Visualize delivering the messages in the highest interests of the employee. Be intentional for the overall experience. What impression do you want the person to walk away from the meeting with?

When you intentionally choose the emotion from which you communicate, you naturally choose words in alignment with that emotion. Effective communication is so much more about where you are coming from when you communicate rather than what you say. Epic Careering offers training in this, and it’s transformative for individuals and organizations. It’s not something that comes naturally. Naturally, we have emotions, and we react in accordance with them. In fast-paced environments, this is the M.O. Thankfully, the techniques for achieving consciousness in communication take only a few minutes and eliminate hardships that stifle progress and innovation.

Of course, everything advised above is focused on keeping the talent you didn’t promote engaged so that the company doesn’t suffer from sabotage, at worst, but also losses in productivity or talent. Consider applying #3 to external candidates who didn’t get the job, as well. You may not have wanted them for this role, and you have decided they’re not even a fit for your culture at all. However, if you see them a potential new node in your network who may refer talent, resources, clients/customers, etc. you expand your employer brand visibility by that person’s network.

I wish I had completed the Landmark Communication curriculum while I was a recruiter. I was very well-intentioned in giving feedback to candidates but found that at times, it induced a defensive reaction. Though most people received feedback very well, the people who didn’t discouraged me from making it a practice. I wish I had known how to communicate more consciously then. It might not have made the difference in all circumstances, but I know it would have made a difference for many of the candidates I intended to help, and maybe they would have been clients.

Just as Brené Brown says that we won’t do empathy perfectly, there’s hardly a thing as perfect communication. There certainly is optimal communication, however.

Fairness in process and consciousness in communication are the best preventions for sabotage, but also the best conductors of highly engaged talent.

CANDLEBOX – “Far Behind” (official video)

New album DISAPPEARING IN AIRPORTS out April 22, 2016 Pre-Order now @Itunes ► http://apple.co/204LvqO @Amazon ► http://amzn.to/1Q9pzWm @Pledge http://bit.ly/1Pb152u Video created by Rob Neilson ( http://www.WiredWebDev.com ) Tour Dates ► http://www.CandleboxRocks.com/ Official Store ►http://bit.ly/1PLirPM Website ► http://www.CandleboxRocks.com/ Facebook ►http://www.facebook.com/candlebox Twitter ► http://www.twitter.com/candlebox Instagram ► https://www.instagram.com/candlebox_official Official YouTube ►https://www.youtube.com/user/CBoxRockers Management ►https://www.PrimaryWave.com

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a corporate consulting and career management firm specializing in executive branding and conscious culture, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play.

While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales.

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify and develop new trends in hiring and careering. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Career Transition Consultant and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot.

She was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business and recently instructed for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy at Cabrini College, where her students won the national competition and were named America’s Top Young Entrepreneurs.

“Can You Teach an Adult Compassion?”

 

This was a question posed by a friend on mine on Facebook. Some were under the impression that you can’t.

My answer:

“You can develop emotional intelligence through mindfulness techniques, but that would have to be voluntary.

‘I tried to find a video I saw (I thought it was Samantha Bee) where they brought global warming deniers through a kind of fun house type of experience where they experience the devastating effects of climate change for themselves. The fear inspired by the special effects changed ~60% of their minds. [I still can’t find this, but I will continue to try. Maybe it was Tosh.O or Sarah Silverman.]

‘There are experiments going on right now with virtual reality. I believe this was either Jane McGonigal or her sister who did a VR experiment on compassion and conservation. [It was Jane who mentioned it, but it was not her experiment– here is the video.] Apparently, participants who cut down a sequoia tree in virtual reality were [more likely to recycle.] Fascinating! There is so much tremendous research going on right now and breakthroughs on the way.”

I also added a fun fact to the thread:

“Did you know under normal circumstances the part of our brain responsible for emotional intelligence doesn’t start to develop until our third decade of life?” [Correction: it doesn’t become fully functional until our 3rd decade of life.]

The insula and anterior cingulate are the parts associated with self-awareness and social awareness. You can absolutely accelerate development of these parts of your brain and the neural circuits through mindfulness techniques. [Cited from Neurowisdom: The New Brain Science of Money, Happiness, and Success by Mark Waldman and Chris Manning, PhD]

I should also point out that development of this part of the brain can also be inhibited. Those who grow up bullied, overly criticized, abused, neglected, etc. are likely to become the ones whose self-talk is overly critical.

Being overly self-critical increases your tendency to find error in everything and everyone. Adjusting your self-talk to be more compassionate stimulates neural circuits associated with empathy. [Also cited from Neurowisdom.] Just like building muscle through repetitive motion and skill through practice, the more you use these neural circuits, the more you will develop compassion for yourself, and others as a byproduct.

So, to follow that further, the people who are most critical of others are the ones who are hardest on themselves.

It seems quite hypocritical to vilify people who are not demonstrating compassion. Science tells us what they need is to love and accept themselves more. This is what I imagine Ghandi meant when he said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.” It’s also why believers in the Law of Attraction advise you to “give what you are seeking” to shift your abundance.

If you want people to be more compassionate, show them more compassion. Show yourself more compassion!

That’s a big one! It’s why the fabulous Brené Brown’s research and teachings have been so embraced. We all crave and need more self-compassion.

There are also experiences, apps, virtual reality games, and exercises that have proven to help accelerate self-compassion as well as outward compassion. New studies are being done all the time. It’s important to note that not only can increases in neural activity associated with compassion be measured, but the neural activity DOES impact behavior.

Here are just a few options:

The Compassion Experience transports people into someone less fortunate’s life. It also is backed by research. It is created by a Christian organization and the events are held at churches over a several-day period. I found four in my local area over the summer, including one at my cousin’s church. It is intended to enhance gratitude and compassion in children and to inspire parents to donate to less fortunate children in different parts of the world. The events are free (at least the ones that I saw, but this could be church-specific.)

Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian prayer said to heal and release. There are four simple lines: I love you; I’m sorry; I forgive you; Thank you. That’s it. It’s the simplest prayer ever. It can be said over and over like a chant, or you can say it every time you look in a mirror. You can say it in the morning as you wake, or at night before you sleep, or both. You can say it out loud or in your head. You can say it with your eyes closed or open. You can say it as though you are talking to yourself, or someone else. It’s not really something you can do wrong.

Mindfulness has many different connotations, and not all of them are clinical or accurate. In fact, the word has been misapplied to mean being positive or meditating. There is no particular breathing technique that you have to learn – just NOTICE your breath. Then notice your thoughts. Notice your emotions. Notice your body. Notice the tiny details of things around you. Notice the vibrancy of colors. Notice the beauty of nature or people. That’s it! That’s all there is to mindfulness. It’s an important step toward accepting and allowing what is, including you, without judgment.

Maybe you think this is for someone else less compassionate than yourself. Well, statistically, people believe they are more compassionate than they are, so it stands to reason that anyone might as well become more compassionate.

Let me know if you have tried any of these methods. Let me know if you would like extra assistance with compassion for yourself or others.

Give a Little Bit Singer/Songwriter Roger Hodgson of Supertramp, with Orchestra

“Give a Little Bit has a wonderful message that makes people light up and I get them to sing with me. It really has a message that is very eternal and is needed even more today than it was when I wrote it when I was 19.

Karen Huller, author of Laser-sharp Career Focus: Pinpoint your Purpose and Passion in 30 Days (bit.ly/GetFocusIn30), is founder of Epic Careering, a career management firm specializing in the income-optimizing power of social media and personal branding, as well as JoMo Rising, LLC, a workflow gamification company that turns work into productive play. While the bulk of her 20 years of professional experience has been within the recruiting and employment industry, her publications, presentations, and coaching also draw from experience in personal development, performance, broadcasting, marketing, and sales. 

Karen was one of the first LinkedIn trainers and is known widely for her ability to identify new trends in hiring and personal marketing. She is a Certified Professional Résumé Writer and Certified Career Transition Consultant and Certified Clinical Hypnotherapist with a Bachelor of Art in Communication Studies and Theater from Ursinus College and a minor in Creative Writing. Her blog was recognized as a top 100 career blog worldwide by Feedspot. 

She was an Adjunct Professor of Career Management and Professional Development at Drexel University’s LeBow College of Business and recently instructed for the Young Entrepreneurs Academy at Cabrini College, where her students won the national competition and were named America’s Top Young Entrepreneurs.